Day 25 is already here! I can’t believe how fast the time goes! I will talk about how I have changed in the past 2 years.2 Years ago, I was still in highschool. I was in my fifth, and also final year. The last year is the most important one in our highschool lives. We have finals that decide if we are qualified to go to college. If you fail, you have to repeat a year or get special classes.
In my final year of highschool I created this fantasy that living on my own would be perfect. No parents that tell you what to do. I was so excited to leave my hometown and explore an unfamiliar territory. I was careless and didn’t think about any of the responsibility I would get while living on my own. 2014 Was a year for me where I just didn’t give 2 shits about anything. I always hung out with my friends and that was basically my life. No worries, no stress.
When I actually passed my finals, I realized, Shit, this is really happening. I’m going to college and I have no idea what I’m suppose to do.
Summer break came and the stress was building up. I was leaving after summer to a place I knew absolutely nobody. At first it didn’t sound bad, but after realizing how young I was and how much I didn’t prepare myself for the real world, I lost it. I was not ready at all.
The day I moved was a bad one. I cried so much. I felt homesick very often. Our family is really big on having a good connection with each other. Family is a big thing in our culture. So, being away from them, from everything I was familiar with, scared me a lot.
2014 was a year that I had to stop being a child and had to start being an adult. It was hard. I’m no going to lie. Living on your own is not as easy peasy lemon squeezy as it looks. My friends always say ”Omg, I would love to live on my own, Omg, you’re so lucky” blah blah blah. They have no idea. They really don’t.
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE living on my own. But it took me a while to feel this way and it wasn’t easy. You have to be your own mom, own dad and own boss. It ain’t easy at all.
Living on my own made me emotionally stronger. I don’t really know how to explain this, but I feel like I can take more things. I don’t break down as easily. I also got to know myself better, because I was everything I had. I learned what I was capable of or what I wasn’t, I discoverd my lifestyle and my personality more.
I got a lot of help as well. My roommate helped me get used to this new way of living. She made it easier to take care of myself. If it weren’t for her, I dont know if I would have been living this confidently as I am now.
In 2015 I switched studies and I was just so sad and confused about what I wanted to do in life. I was struggling with this matter for a long time. I wanted to do a marine biology study, but it just wasn’t possible. I couldn’t handle that. It was a dream I held onto for 10 years and it was right in front of me and I couldn’t chase it. It took me a long ass time to find peace with the fact that I just couldn’t do it. Once I accepted that, I started to love my current study. I am still holding onto my dream, but if I can wait for 10 years, I can wait a few more years. I might be able to combine my current media major with marine biology. Who knows? I learned to let go and I learned to make sacrifices.
In the past 2 years I had a ” revolution ” in my life. I had to force myself to stop being a child and start being an adult. I got to know myself better and I started to appreciate myself more. Not everybody is capable in adapting so soon ad so quickly. I became stronger as a person. I learned how to stand strong in my own shoes and I learned to depend on myself to make decisions. The part 2 years have only made me into a better person. I am not scared of being alone anymore, I’m embracing it now. I’m confident in what I do and who I am. I hope I will continue to grow this way and learn even more things!
How did you change in the past 2 years?
~Good Vibes Only~